The (Un)Daily Gyaru - Season 64

Fan”art”: The Elden Gyaru — Core Cast

The girls as various characters from Elden Ring.

We’ll start with the current cast and Queen Kassiopeia the Eternal:
Cassy: “Mhmmm… I look like a powerful queen and that dress is sexy, but the demea—” 🤔
Siggy: (gulp)
Cassy: “Siggy?! Are you into the golden eyes and the condescending expression?” 😮
Siggy: “No, of course not!”
Siggy: “Maybe… a little!”
Cassy: “Really?!? OK, let me try…”
Cassy: “O wretched Tarnished. On thy knees. Thy Queen demandeth thine utmost devo—”
Cassy: “Uhhhhh…” 😳

… next we have Melanie the Witch:
Azdael: “Does that make you happy, huh?”
Melanie: “An age of cold, silent stars. Everyone very far away. Blissful.”
Azdael: “Remember, for you magic powers only exist in fanart!”
Melanie: “I wish at least these four arms were real. Two for the book, two for Kitty.” 🖤
Rhia: “I dun’t mind gettin’ attention with all four, bach!” 💛

… Amy, Goddess of Rot:
Amy: “Aye, straight tae phase 2! None o’ tha’ messin’ aroond wi’ claes!”
Amy: “Ah’m ready tae pound ma foes intae the flower bed! Ah’ve never kent defeat!”
Ricardo: “Let me solo her.”
Amy: “Guid luck, pal! Ah’ll try tae be gentle!” 💙

… and Rhia as Blaidd the Half-Wolf:
Rhia: “Tha’s pretty daft, mun!”
Melanie: “Blaidd is Ranni’s sworn shadow. Wouldn’t you like to be my pet, Kitty?”
Rhia: “The name’s the problem.”
Rhia: “Blaidd just means wolf, bach. Tha’s like callin’ me Llwynog the Half-Fox!”
Rhia: “Proper twp, innit?”
Rhia: “An’ anyway, a full vixen, I am!”
Melanie: “That you are.” 🖤

… Sandra, Queen of the Full Moon:
Sandra: “‘Queen of the Full Moon’? I have spent twenty years insisting on ‘Dr. Flößer’, and now this.”
Amy: “Ye can also be Maw o’ Melly!”
Siggy: “Or Heartbroken Wife of Cassy.”
Ricardo: “Or Stepmother of Amy.”
Sandra: “What?!? Is everyone related in this game?”
Amy: “Aye!”
Sandra: “Na servas… I’ll stick with Queen, then…”

… Azdael, Lord of Blood:
Azdael: “The Azdael dynasty shall rise!”
Azdael: “I certainly won’t be charmed by a blonde femboy…”
Azdael: “… and end up as nothing but the stepping stone for the DLC!”
Fiona: “Ye’re a wee bit late, sugar. Ah’m already spoken fer, so Ah am!”
Azdael: “…the DLC hasn’t even started!”

Fan”art”: The Elden Gyaru - Next Gen

And the next gen girls aren’t left out either.

… Ciri as Melina:
No fancy title here.
Fiona: “Ye’re the bonfire lassie, aye?”
Ciri: “Apparently…”
Fiona: “Ah’m maidenless. Are ye gonnae touch ma grace an’ aw, sugar?” ❤️‍🔥
Ciri: “Give over, Fi-Fi!”

… Yuki the Deathbed Companion:
Yuki: “Look, I’m giving out free hugs.” ☺️
Ciri: “For 100% HP in return, mun.”
Yuki: “Not true! I can be super gentle!” 😤
Yuki: “And if that’s still too strong, they just have to grind a little for their reward.” 😉🩵
Ciri: “A sense of pride and accomplishment, innit…”
Yuki: “Exactly!”

… Mio the Fire Giant:
Yuki: “Aren’t you a little short for a giant, Mimi?” 🤔
Mio: “Lembo! Who’s sayin’ a cawr’s got to be tall, like? Ever read Norse mythology, mun?”
Fiona: “Lassie’s got a point, so she does!”
Mio: “Besides… scorching hot, I am. An’ I’ve got giant boobs, a giant arse, an’—”
Ciri: “A giant ego?”
Mio: “Cau it, me chwaer!”

… and for the grand finale, Starscourge Fiona the Promised Consort:
Fiona: “Braw! Ah’m the final boss o’ final bosses, so Ah am!”
Mio: “The twpsyn everyone’s hatin’ on, innit?”
Fiona: “Aye! Ah like poundin’ folk as much as ma maw!”
Amy: “Haud on… in the lore, ye’re no’ ma bairn, ye’re ma big sister!”
Sandra: “If I follow… I’m the mother…”
Mio: “Proper convoluted, innit?”

Fiona: “An’ folk say the fight’s unfair. Ah ran the numbers. They’re juist bad, so they are!”
Fiona: “Ye hae tae get yer siller’s worth frae the DLC, ken?”
Yuki: “That’s so thoughtful of you, Ama-tan!” 😊
Fiona: “That’s the lass Ah am. Always puttin’ others afore ma own enjoyment!”
Ciri: “Sure you do, mun…”

Fan”art”: The Elden Gyaru — Bonus Scenes

… Tarnished Siggy gets tricked by Patchy Ricky the Untethered.

Ricardo: “Why don’t you have a peek in this chest?”
Ricardo: “Trust me, your fortune awaits inside.”
Siggy: “I have some serious dou—”
Siggy: “Ughhh!”
Ricardo: “More ‘fortune’ than you bargained for…”

Amy: “Oi, look ower yonder, ma Queen! The wee lad found ma Amazin' chest ahead message.”
Siggy: “Where am I?”
Cassy: “O little Tarnished! Hast thou fallen from grace, and doth thy flesh seek redemption?”
Cassy: “Thy request shall be granted. Brace thyself for our divine challenge!”
Siggy: “Request? What?”
Amy: “Ye fell intae oor double boss challenge, an’ we’ll test the limits o’ yer stamina an’ poise! Melee only, nae summons, nae armour, nae magic.”
Cassy: “And the trial shall not cease until the Tarnished can stand no longer.” 😳
Siggy: “…until I what.”
Amy: “Ye heard the lass. We’re havin’ loads o’ sex!”
Siggy: “Ohh… that’s… fine…”

…

GOD DUO… SATISFIED?
Cassy: “Thy vigour deserveth praise, O little Tarnished.”
Amy: “Ye’ve qualified fer a rematch, pal!”

Ricardo: “Why am I the asshole in this scenario?”
Cassy: “Uhhhm… are you?” 😅
Siggy: “Well… kinda…”
Amy: “Dinnae be jealous, pal! Ye can also re-enter ma boss arena anytime fer some braw one-on-one close-quarters action.”

… Ciri awakens as the Gloam-Eyed Queen!

Ciri: “O foul, wretched Tarnished, thy choice disappointeth me!”
Ciri: “Thou chosest to refuse mine offer most kind?”
Ciri: “Thou leavest me no choice! I shall beat the Frenzied Flame out of thee!”
Ciri: “My wrath alone shall set the Erdtree ablaze!”

Yuki: “Whoa, Cece, you’re pretty scary!” 😨
Mio: “That’s nothin’, mun! Try eatin’ me chwaer’s favourite cookies, mind!”
Fiona: “Ah’m gettin’ excited, so Ah am! Ye can extinguish ma flame anytime, sugar!” ❤️‍🔥
Ciri: “Ughhhh…”
Ciri: “That is pretty cool, though… Proper tidy, innit!”